Praying for what?

Going through trials and struggles sucks. It's an awful feeling to be hurt or see others hurt, but at the same time I love how close I feel to God when I'm struggling. The other day I found myself praying for more struggles so I can keep building that relationship with him and keep feeling that closeness. Then I realized what that meant. Sure it's okay if my "struggles" are only surface deep, but what happens if I pray for this closeness to deepen and I lose someone close to me or something else unimanginable happens? Will my faith be strong enough to see me through it and come out a better Christian...will I be able to stay as close as I want to God during the most difficult times? I guess right now I'll just be thankful that I don't have to really worry about that. I will learn more, pray more, worship more while things are good so I don't have to worry about my faith waivering when things aren't the greatest.